Wondering what I mean here?
There are times when you feel at peace with yourself. Nothing has really changed around you, not your parents, not your boss, not even your dog (I am sure nobody wants to change their dog though!). But then you feel at peace, as simple as that. It is only when you have made peace with yourself, your environment, all the mundane routine that has encompassed you in its claws, or so you feel, yet slowly but surely you feel in control.
We see so many self help books popping up everyday. They all relate to the same thing one way or the other. The basics I have learnt can be summarised as follows.
You cannot change the world, you have to change yourself. When you are low on motivation/self esteem/courage, these make you fear certain things around you. When there is chaos inside, it reflects on your outside. So while we are busy searching for peace in temples, mountains, sages, forests, it is right there, inside us. It is all about perception and self motivation. In different stages of life, there maybe someone to motivate you, but it is not always possible. The best person to motivate you is only yourself.
I have always known walking and exercising to be good for health (all of us do) and yet I could not bring myself up to it. I always knew walking makes us feel more energetic, fresh and positive. Still I had a ton of reasons (excuses, now if I look at it) to NOT walk, but once I started walking regularly, I wondered why didn't I do it earlier? Lack of self motivation, yes!
When I was diagnosed with depression, the psychiatrist asked me start walking everyday. I could not do it immediately, but I kept trying. I failed if I tried mornings because I was stressed with the day's tasks. Afternoon, of course, is a bad time to walk. Evening post seven pm seemed like an ideal time because I am done with most of my day's tasks by then. Once I started with it, I started feeling nice. Because I felt nice, I wanted to walk. And so it went on.
Now I have been walking for almost two months everyday, doing 8000 steps a day for at least 5 days a week, which is good for a mother of two, I think :) So the most important thing here is to start. Once you start, aim for consistency. No matter how much or how well you do something, aim to just do it regularly. The rest will fall in place on its own.
Here I will deviate a little to people I am most partial to, homemakers :)
I think most women, especially home makers, take their time for granted. We are at home, yes, but it does not mean we make ourselves available for everyone 24/7 without keeping any of our needs in mind. Prioritise, plan and execute, like a CEO, because you are one, of your home and family. If you function well, the household will, too. If you don't, everything else will also fall apart. Make time everyday for your fitness and hobbies. If not everyday, at least 4 days a week. Leave what is not so important. Procrastinate(yes you heard it right) some cleaning if you need to. Divide the chores among the kids and the husband, because they are part of the family too. Everybody needs to contribute to make a family really work. They will learn and appreciate what you do for them.
You are there!
Nothing will change around you, but a renewed you will be at peace with the things around and nothing can disturb your own little zen of peace :)